As Seen in Canada....

Its been awhile, eh?? EH??? Oh dear...

No really I dont say eh all the time, just when Im conversing with hardcore Canadiens...the ones I have determined are poutine eating, hockey playing, french speaking, boot wearing Canadiens. Aka, my husband.

Yes my husband! Over a month now since our wedding, time has flown by. We had a great wedding and wonderful honeymoon. Now we've been settling in and getting used to NOT having a plane ticket in the opposite direction.

Since I crossed the border in Toronto as a visitor, I've drank lots of Tim Horton's coffee, cleaned up after my former bachelor, bought a bedroom set, searched for jobs, had two interviews, actually got a part time job offer, watched a lot of the View (I'm so glad that Hasselbeck chick is having babies right now...I cant stand that woman), developed a love-hate relationship with the landlord, made some new friends, got a Christmas tree, drank more wine than I ever had before, hosted the in-laws for that dreaded "first meal," turned this apartment into a home and loved my husband more than is humanly possible.

Its been an adjustment for me I must say. I still dont know what temperature it really is in this Celsius part of the world, except that 0 C degrees is 32 F degrees...but a third grader knows that so that isnt really an accomplishment on my part. And what the fuck is a kilometer??? Near as I can tell, my only measuring stick (Haaaa!) is that 90 kilometers is approximately 60 miles...and for someone that is from North Dakota and measures distance in TIME not MILES...well I dont know how the hell long it takes me to get from here to there.

They recycle here...ok so thats not earthshattering because Americans arent completely recycling retarded...except me...because my mom didnt want to waste time recycling as she called it. So my job is to sort of figure out what is recycled, then set it next to the "blue box" as it is called, and then my husband is in charge of crushing said recycleable products to fit into tiny ass blue box. This much I know about recycling in the States...we had three boxes to recycle paper, plastic and glass....I get one, freaking "blue box" to pile all the crap into, and two WEEKS between recycling pickup. Garbage gets picked up on Tuesdays and Fridays.....sometimes Im just tempted to put the shit outside on those days because Im tired of it sitting in my home.

They drink milk from plastic bags...I cant find a gallon jug on this side of the border. And it tastes like ass, because that little cut you make in the bag allows for absorption of your other fridge items into the milk, causing the milk to take on other "flavours." Ewww...the only way this plastic bag business is even close to practical is if you have a separate fridge just for the milk. And thats a damn luxury these days. So thank the lord, they still believe in those cardboard cartons...

Speaking of groceries, they are really expensive here. Especially meat and dairy products. That has been one of the biggest shockers...and no its not just the taxes on that stuff that is high, its the base price that kills me. The taxes I dont notice yet. Oh and in case you didnt know, we are assessed in two tax brackets for products...the GST (Government Sales Tax) and PST (Product and Services Tax...and its provinicial). Something has gotta pay for that free healthcare!

The phone book is hilarious...well not really but in the Yellow pages there are listings for Escort Services. Something NOT seen in the US, at least now that I'm aware of. And I have seen more adult porn stores recently than I have in my entire life. The phone book isnt really hilarious its a big pain in the rear because they have things categorized differently...its a language thing I think.

What county am I in?? I dont know that either....I think its called a district.

Dumb question asked about Canada by me..."If there is an emergency, and I need help asap, what do I call??"

"911"...

"oooh, something familiar!!!

So I have a work offer but it takes 54 days to get a work permit...so I still sit here...talk about frustrating. I can totally not do this dutiful housewife thing...no offense to those that are housewives, you women rock the shit I cant even touch at this venture in my life. I hate staying home all day and when I do have the car for the day I wander aimlessly in the mall or grocery store just as bored as if I didnt have the car and was stuck at home.

I need a hobby. My husband has a keyboard so I've gotten back into playing a bit which is great.

We finally get tv on Friday and I'll get CNN, my outlet to American news. Right now I've been on MSNBC and CNN like a fiend.

My husband plays hockey weekly so I have become a hockey wife...I go to most of the games...and I'm excited for the tournaments coming up in the next two weeks...those are really fun and have the best parties. Thats how I've met some new people, through his hockey. We also watch hockey on tv when we get the chance...last night we went to Don Cherry's to watch Montreal vs Toronto. Hockey is definitely king up here.

Funny question asked by an American about Canada...

"Do they have Halloween up there?"

Yes Virginia, there is a Great Pumpkin...