The Problem With Pink

Pink is an obnoxious color. Yes I do own a few pink items and occasionally find pink to be an endearing color. But it is obnoxious.

Pink little girls. Automatically from the moment they emerge from womb, kicking screaming and dripping fluids, little girls are socialized to wear and like pink and be all precious and yada yada, yank yank. My own mother told me that I was literally head to toe in pink for church a few times. Pink socks, pink lined diaper, pink shoes, pink dress, pink onsie, pink ruffled bottom, pink hat, pink jacket in a pink stroller drinking out of a pink bottle. I also had a pink bedroom with pink walls. My mother is not surprised that I don't like pink. No freakin wonder I hate pink! Put the girl in some blue. It ain't gonna make her a boy. No wonder Freud thought little girls all wanted penises...they got to wear better colors!!! Penis envy totally makes sense now.

Pepto Bismol is pink. Ever had Pepto Bismol? Ever had an episode that required Pepto Bismol? Is that supposed to be soothing to the eyes and therefore soothing on the bowels? What about pink cough medicine or antibiotics? I can't imagine any soothing qualities that pink may have on the body.

Pink Valentines. Who associated pink with the color of love?? I thought it was red. And I will ALWAYS object to pink M & M's except in the case of promoting breast cancer awareness.

A grown ass woman wearing pink. Blinding hot pink. And she isn't in a bar sloppin around and pickin up men A classmate of mine decided to fill this role today, hence my above discussion on the obnoxious qualities of pink. She came in wearing this blazing hot metallic pink winter coat and pink rubber boots (don't make me say that again). Her bag had pink lining and her mittens were pink striped. When she took her coat off, her shirt beneath matched. Halfway through class she pulls out this bright ass pink stiletto pump. What the hell? Shoes like that should be illegal. AND she paid $90 bucks for the damn things!! Holy hell, did she ever get ripped off. Seriously I couldn't concentrate for the rest of the lecture. That kind of thing (the jacket, not the person) should be asked to leave the room.

"Excuse me, could you hang your coat up outside? My retinas are burning off."