This Note Has No Ending...

The Summer of 2004 I will simply state that I was an asshole from May until August. When you have a man break your heart, you do weird shit. Like drink heavily on your little brother's graduation (freakin grandma didn't want any wine and made me drink it all!), suck it up and fake happiness...ok so I didn't do that...well not very well anyway...be an asshole, drink some more, hit on people I shouldn't hit on and then finally cap it off with my own college graduation and crawling out from under the hangover. And throughout that awful summer, Rumba was there, miles away but there just the same. At this point, we were really close and talking every day, sometimes for hours. We would even fight. But we never signed off angry and always talked through disagreements or arguments.

By October 2005, Rumba and I were seriously considering meeting face to face, but we weren't entirely sure how to go about it. I was working full time and didnt have a snowballs chance in hell of getting away and he was a student with a spring break in February! Perfect! So then came the ultimate decision of our lives and we both just said....doooo it! So, he hemmed and hawed about telling his mom that he was going to meet a strange girl in NoDak while I pretty much avoided the topic with my own parents. I didn't figure they would take it too well when I told them a man was coming to stay with me for a week. When he finally told his mom, she was really super excited for him, helped him book his flights and was super supportive of his trip. They ALL wanted to know about me and why Rumba was traveling so far to meet a girl.

Meanwhile back in NoDak, I was trying to keep a level head about things and not get my hopes up or fall for a man I haven't met. And I was drinking again. I think I was having fun and at the same time I was teetering too. My friend Nelle and I were out partying every weekend with her husband's friends and they can get pretty crazy. She tried 6 ways from Sunday to set me up with her husband's brother and another friend in the crowd. Both were bad catches but I sure did play along and enjoy the fun. But I was drunk from November to January no doubt. I think it was a way for me to deal with the stress from work and lonliness. I had graduated and my friends weren't calling anymore. After her wedding, I stopped drinking and partying. Didn't have it in me anymore. Plus Rumba was concerned about my behavior, something we also argued over. But once again, we prevailed and he made me see the light. I figured I had it all in and it was time to get on with life. Plus...Rumba was coming!!

I can't tell you how excited and nervous and crazy we were in those last weeks leading up to our meeting. I had finally told my parents about him and that of course led to 100 questions leading up to his arrival. We were planning and talking and figuring out how it was all going to go. We were also anticipating what may or may not happen while he was there and how we would handle the consequences. We didn't know about a long distance relationship and how we could get through it together. So we just decided to play it cool, see what happens and not get too excited about anything while he was there. Basically to enjoy the moments and each other. But it was really hard to deny the strong feelings that we were both having for each other.

The day of his arrival he called me at 10am his time and was telling me he was burning a CD for me and that he was getting ready to leave soon. He said to look for a cute guy in a blue jacket carrying a red backpack. Of course we had been passing photos back and forth for some time so I knew who to look for. After we hung up, I rolled over excited about the cute guy in the blue jacket...and then fell asleep again. haha! After I got myself up and ready, I cleaned like a madwoman while my roomie laughed at me. She kept saying "he's going to say EH every few seconds and have this weird accent." Yeah maybe. Oh and I was chewing on my fingers something fierce. My already terrible nail biting habit escalated 10-fold that day. Plus I was being such a nerd and following his flights online. Everything was on time and I was just hoping that he didn't get lost between connections. He was taking 4 flights. From his hometown to Toronto, to Chicago, to Minneapolis to NoDak. He had a very long travel day from 1pm his time to 10pm my time.

Driving out to the airport was the longest drive of my life. It was dark, it seemed like people were taking FOREVER to drive and I kept seeing airplanes coming in to the airport (damn you avit people!) so I kept thinking I was late. Well I wasnt, and I arrived on time. I parked the car and walked into the terminal and paced. And paced. And paced. There were all these women standing around with their kids and they were watching me pace. I was staring out the windows willing the damn lights on the runway to start blinking. 9:50, 9:55, 10:00...lights on the runway light up.

I can hear his plane coming in and I'm starting to choke up. I can't believe he's going to be real in a few minutes. And then I see the plane land and a few tears fall as I smile with relief and anxiety and excitment. I wait patiently as a few people deplane and walk into the terminal. Most of them are GI's. Rumba is about the 6th person off the plane and I only see him after that. I don't remember any of the people at the airport. I can only watch him as he tries to find me with this big grin on his face. He finally sees me approaching him and he opens his arms to hug me. We hug for a long time and I say "I can't believe you're real." Both of our hearts are thumping through our chests and we got these ridiculously silly grins on our faces. He's shaking a little bit as we talk about his big day and continue to marvel at each other. We gather up his luggage and make our way to the car.

I forgot where I parked. Actually I'm pretty sure I never paid any attention at all as to where I put the Beast. Thank Christ the airport parking lot is like 20 spaces total so its not like we had to look very far. We were both so giddy and nervous we walked in circles for awhile til I found it. I just couldn't concentrate on anything at that point.

We stopped to pick up dinner at Subway (oh so romantic) and we went to his hotel room. He was staying there for the first 2 nights as a way to break the ice and such before he came to my place. We hung out in his hotel room and exchanged gifts that we bought. He brought me a Canada paperweight, a Dave Matthews poster, a beautiful print of two white tigers, a Wolves jersey and Sudbury Bear. I had a Sioux jersey for him, a Sioux hat, and two roses for him. We just sat there and stared at each other, trying to be sure it wasn't a dream. It all felt surreal to have that experience. The first night of our week was just a preview of our week ahead....